What I have to deal with on my return

In order for me to get an interview for a job at mumsnet I had to do a 5-question test and submit my test to a recruitment consultant. The last question was about creating a shopping cart for a website, after telling the consultant I have never done this he still continued to e-mail me, asking me to do something I could not create.

I also told him my phone was broken since before 8am this morning I had recieved 3 phone calls from him and wished to not hear his voice anymore.

From: Nicky Mc Allister 


Sent: 02 November 2011 10:17am

To: James Goddard


Subject: Re: Hi Nicky -

Hi James,

Please find attached the answers to the test along with an updated CV with no contact details. my mobile phone is currently not working and do not have a contact number so any questions please email me.

I did not answer question 5 as I have never created a shopping cart before.

I have attached the answers as a PDF and separate HTML files.

Thanks,

Nick

From: James Goddard


Sent: 02 November 2011 10:18am


To: Nicky Mc Allister 


Subject: Re: Hi Nicky -

Hi Nicky,

Is it possible to create a shopping cart today maybe using the internet or code libraries as a basis for it, as if you don’t have this in the test I don’t think you’ll be successful.

Kind Regards,

James

From: Nicky Mc Allister

Sent: 02 November 2011 10:27am

To: James Goddard


SSubject: Re: Hi Nicky -

Hi James

Yes I can do that sure, what time would you like it done by? When is the deadline?

Thanks,

Nick

From: James Goddard

Sent: 02 November 2011 10:28am


To: Nicky Mc Allister


Subject: Re: Hi Nicky –

Nicky,

No deadline for it apart from maybe tomorrow evening: do you know what your ETA would be and I can work out whether that would be doable?

Kind Regards,

James

From: Nicky Mc Allister

Sent: 02 November 2011 10:38am


To: James Goddard 


Subject: Re: Hi Nicky –

Hi James

I should be able to create a fully working shopping cart by the end of the day.

One question should you be able to pay by paypal?

Many Thanks,

Nick

From: James Goddard

Sent: 02 November 2011 10:41am

To: Nicky Mc Allister

Subject: Re: Hi Nicky –

Yes –

From: Nicky Mc Allister

Sent: 02 November 2011 10:43am

To: James Goddard

Subject: Re: Hi Nicky –

Hi James

ok also if once paid by paypal, should they receive an e-mail confirming the order? the same way amazon does?

Many Thanks,

Nick

From: James Goddard

Sent: 02 November 2011 10:46am

To: Nicky Mc Allister

Subject: Re: Hi Nicky –

Hi Nick

I’m unsure about that : What I would suggest is just follow the instructions to the letter. Don’t make the process more complex than it needs to be as it is likely you’ll make an error etc.

James

From: Nicky Mc Allister

Sent: 02 November 2011 10:50am

To: James Goddard

Subject: Re: Hi Nicky –

Ah ok I suppose the more I do the better chance I would have of getting an interview. 

I will try and keep it simple I will add the paypal feature I will send you something today,

Thanks for your help

Nick

From: James Goddard

Sent: 02 November 2011 10:58am

To: Nicky Mc Allister

Subject: Re: Hi Nicky –

Thanks Nicky – I really appreciate that and as soon as you get it over to me I will forward it to the client.

I have asked your question to them anyway : So if they get back to me in the mean time I will also let you know.

Kind Regards,

James

Bearing in mind I told james my phone was broke I now had 8 missed calls from him today, my phone is not really broken I just can’t stand being asked 8 times to do something I cannot do, for an interview I may never get.

From: James Goddard

Sent: 02 November 2011 4;25pm

To: Nicky Mc Allister

Subject: Re: Hi Nicky –

How is the shopping cart thing going?

James

From: James Goddard

Sent: 02 November 2011 4;40pm

To: Nicky Mc Allister

Subject: Re: Hi Nicky –

Hi James,

I have been working all day on this I hope it's good enough for me to get an interview.

Many Thanks,

Nick

From: James Goddard

Sent: 02 November 2011 4;43pm

To: Nicky Mc Allister

Subject: Re: Hi Nicky –

Have you been able to attach it to an email and send it to me?

James

From: Nicky Mc Allister

Sent: 02 November 2011 4;44pm

To: James Goddard

Subject: Re: Hi Nicky –

Yes here you go it should be attached.

  

From: James Goddard

 

Sent: 02 November 2011 4;54pm

To: Nicky Mc Allister

Nicky,

That is a very literal interpretation of the brief.

James

From: Nicky Mc Allister

Sent: 02 November 2011 5:01 pm

To: James Goddard

Yes you are right I guess it's not good enough being a graphic designer I should really make it better.

How is this?

I feel it is more modern. What do you think?

__________________________________________________________

James is ringing again I don’t answer I await an email reply.

_______________________________________________________

From: James Goddard

Sent: 02 November 2011 5:04 pm

To: Nicky Mc Allister

Hi Nicky,

Mirth aside - have you been able to do the task they presented or have

you basically had second thoughts etc.

James

From: Nicky Mc Allister

Sent: 02 November 2011 5:07 pm

To: James Goddard

I had second thoughts, I can't handle the pressure of the shopping carts any more

every time I blink I see more of them.

here is an image representation of what I see.

From: Nicky Mc Allister

Sent: 02 November 2011 5:07 pm

To: James Goddard

Hi Nicky,

I actually had a chat with mumsnet and ironically they just sent me this

over:

Our answer is: The test is concerned with HTML and CSS. How the form or

any other elements should function (beyond what's specified), such as

how payments should work or how the back-end application is structured,

is not relevant. Those are details which can be omitted from any

solution.

Hopefully this can help you with your trolley mania.

Just to focus back on this position Nicky : Can you give me a straight

answer or not on whether you'd like me to keep your application live as

obviously we've both got busy lives etc (Getting trollied) and this is a

waste of time.

James

From: Nicky Mc Allister

Sent: 02 November 2011 5:07 pm

To: James Goddard

ok James I will try and concentrate on the question at hand.

I will send you some HTML and CSS tomorrow now it has been clarified.

Have a good evening

Nick

Continued tomorrow........

Top 25 pictures from New Zealand

In no particular order enjoy - Click to enlarge.

Catch up Blog - Australia - Brisbane

After leaving Fiji escaping through an ash cloud, we finally arrived in Brisbane.

The flight was OK except you didn't have a choice of entertainment so I was subdued to watching the Justin Bloody Beiber film - "Never say Never"

I watched this tripe and can explain this cinematic masterpiece in three sentences.

Singing kid makes youtube video, twatty record executive tells "Usher" to help kid make another youtube video. 

tweeny boppeers go apeshit that a kid is on youtube with "Usher" and so a star is born.

The end.

To me he still looks like a lesbian.

(This is a real lesbian you can find more at the website http://lesbianswholooklikejustinbieber.tumblr.com/)

We got off the plane, got the train straight from the airport to our hostel booked for us in advance by STA travel back in England.

It was a typical Base hostel (Base is a chain of hostels operating in New Zealand and Oz) Base to me always means Basic and no frills accommodation.

Inside it looked haunted especially the Lift Of Death*

*Lift Of Death - Responsible for killing people since 1908 which is probably when this place was built.

Notice the big "CHECKING OUT?" poster. Checking out? Of this place? You fuckin bet.

There are 5 floors but this lift only goes to the top and bottom floor no matter what button you push!

Want to go to the second floor? You can't. Your going to have to risk your life and avoid the Ghosts that walk the hallways at night.

Staying here reminded me of Ghostbusters, I kept thinking will I see Slimer here? 

Had a look around Brisbane before booking our trip to Fraiser Island, it’s not a bad little place.

But I spotted a Burger King, but it's called ”Hungry Jacks”.

Why is it called Hungry Jack's? well Wikipedia explains:

"When Burger King moved to expand its operations into Australia, it found that its business name was already trademarked by a takeaway food shop in Adelaide"

Now call me stupid but if Burger King has so much money, couldn't it just buy back the name from one takeaway shop?

Look what else I found, a Woolworths it's still running somewhere in the world!

Its like Tescos its massive and sells everything! Having used to work in Woolworths I was happy to see the place still in business J

We got back to the hostel and booked our package deal to Fraser Island, but still had a night to kill so headed off to Chinatown.

It was one of the smallest Chinatown's I have ever been to but had a pearnut butter flaming chicken dish it was pretty good!

(I had to wait until the flames went out to eat it though!)

Next stop Fraser Island!

Hello kids!

Yes its been a while, but i have been island hoping around FIJI with has very limited internet or none!

Its been a nice chilled out 10 days here I will try and explain the highlights below.

Flew from Auckland to Nadi its a very short 3 hour flight with air pacific, which makes a nice change from the massive 9+ hour flights we have been doing!

Walking around the airport I spotted a collection of jack daniels on display!
one day i will own you all!

Jumped on the plane and before I knew it i could see the beautiful mainland of Nadi!

Got off the plane and was greeted by some locals playing guitar and singing to all the passengers

waited for my luggage and looking around duty free again and bought this.

I couldn't help myself and it was cheap! So I slapped my card down and added more weight to my 19.5kg rucksack!

Got a cab from the airport and checked into our hostel for the night, ready to leave early at 7am to catch the boat to our first island.

Took a 4 hour and 30 minute journey to the very north islands for our first stop

Nacula Island - Labuna Lodge

Arrived to the island and was greeted by the locals shouting out "BULA" which translates to "hello" and many other things (i'll get into that later)

Spent the day walking down the beach and tried to smash a coconut I found. Then one of the locals managed to crack it open with a spike attached to a tree.

Doesn't get much more organic than that!

On each island their are a few activites to do, I decided to go fishing.
What a mistake that was.

I encountered the worst sea sickness of my life! I even jumped out of the boat halfway through the journey just to get away from the rockiness!

Which was another mistake since when I put my head under the water the saltiness of the sea got to me bad.

so there I was in the middle of the sea with a headache salty shit up my sinuses, suncream and insect repellent in my eyes.

I was fucked.

Swam back to the boat and just sat as still as I could. I got back to the hostel and just crashed out until dinnertime.

Sat around meeting a few other travellers then I was introduced to the "BULA" dance, which is half macrena and half kicking a man at the end in the balls while shouting "BULA, BULA".

It was a good night in the end and this was the view I woke up the next day when I had to leave.

After a short stay at the small island Nacula with the friendly people at Nabula Lodge I then spent a night at Korovou. It was a sunday and I think it was everyone's day off! the people seemed unintrested in their guests there was no dancing or games at night and the power shut off at 10pm.

(as you can see it was pretty dead apart from some people greeting you!)

It was ok though, since I met some fellow travellers from glasgow on the first island, that were doing the same package deal as us, so at least we had some company!

So me and Adrian and some others went down the beach to find people from the other resort, sitting around a burning fire (it's already 100 degrees on the beach and sitting by the fire it was hotter than satans bumhole).

After spending one night in korovou, it was a short trip to wai lai lai which is a bigger more friendly island I was greeted by many kids again shouting BULA! at me.

This island had a bar and some more dancing, I was cheated out of winning the game, no free booze for me that night.

So I ordered some cocktails and sat down and started chatting to a girl from poland who 11 years used to go drinking in the same pub as me in wimbledon!

(Sorry Aga I could not find a good picture of you!)

freaky or what! after a long chat I headed off to bed ready for tomorrow.

Had a nice lay in, then went down to the beach to get ready for shark snorkling with baby sharks, Adrian manged to capture some shots underwater.

Don't worry these types of shark won't bite you!

Beachcomber is said to be the party island of FIJI! The only reason why this is true, is because this island is the only one with a bar open till late!

They also do some pretty good food

Saw some fire-eaters, more bula dancing and had quite a few cocktails, if I find any pictures of this night I might post them.

Saldy a few friends we made along the way were going home, so said our goodbyes and made our way to the last island on the trip.

Got to southsea island around 6pm, it is the smallest island in fiji you can walk around the whole island in 5 minutes!

Remember earlier, I said a bunch of kids were shouting "BULA" at me, well here is a list of activites to do on an island.

Notice the word "BULA" again

On another island they had a "BULA" bar

I guess it means more than one thing?

BULA dance
BULA activities
BULA bar
BULA = Hello

BULA = Can't be arsed to find a better fitting word?

Only 12 of us were staying that night due to it being so small and we had a crabrace!

I called my crab "Queeny" and it lost.

You may ask why did I call my crab queeny? Well I dug up an english note, New Zealand note and Fiji note, which all have the queen of england printed on them.

If you can see on this bad picture, the queen is youngest in England, then older in New Zealand and even older in FIJI, taken the only country she is smiling in is FIJI
maybe this was after a BULA dance or Kava? Kava is the drink of choice for the locals here, it comes straight from a plant, and mixed with hot water into a large bowl.

kava!

Me drinking Kava! With a local!

The next day I chilled out again, there were some activites but they all include a boat journey of some sort and after my fishing trip I avoided it like the plague.

Still one more night to go then off to Australia!

Will keep you posted! : )